I've found my life calling.
And it's been one of those journeys where I knew the destination beforehand, but it has taken me SOOOO LONG to see the scope and the HOW.
Backstory: I always knew that, when it came down to it, I just wanted to stay home and be a mom. And I hate to say "just" like that, but what I mean is "that's all I wanted." I wanted to stay home and focus my energy on building my family and making it the best that I could. Which is hard stuff, 7 years, 7 months, and 3 weeks into it. And it will be hard LOOOONNNNNG after this, as well.
Back to the present: I work at a gym daycare, which I've mentioned before. I've been there for 2 years, 7 months, and 2 weeks. And I have worked at 5 different locations throughout Utah and Salt Lake County. Thassss lossa kiddos. Wanna know what I have loved best about this job? It isn't that I get a free gym pass, or that Brandon gets a free gym pass, or even that my shifts are at MOST 5 hours.
What I love best is the kids.
That also, incidentally, is the hardest part of the job. But that's not what I'm focusing on. These children have taught me so much about love, and trust, and well-children. And that's beyond the degree in Behavioral Science and Family Studies. I have learned to love, and hug, and trust, and smile, and wipe away tears, and be that constant for them. I love when new families come in, and they have a scared child that doesn't want Mom or Dad to leave. I get to step in and be the constant for them while the parent is away. And I build trust with them. And they hold my hand while we walk to find a toy that they will like, or go get a picture to color. And by the end of the 90 minutes, I've made a new, true friend. I feel like, in these moments, I get a glimpse of how the Savior loves and sees them.
For most of my adult life, this approach has not translated to other adults. :-/ I kinda figured, "They're old enough to make their own choices and deal with whatever happens. They can suck it up and take it just like everybody else."
And then I started coaching. Initially, I saw a great opportunity to supplement our income and even take over so that Brandon could go back to school or focus on getting his dream job. I still see that, but at first that was all I was focused on. Me. It's amazing that I've even been able to convince people to let me be their coach. Don't get me wrong, I had every intention of being an honest coach, with integrity and determination to help others, and have done my best to do that. But my heart wasn't all the way in it. I was focused on the money.
And now, 1 year later, almost exactly, I am FINALLY starting to get it right. It has taken me AN ENTIRE YEAR to get my brain and my focus in the right place, to change my heart and shift my focus, so that what I am offering comes from a place of love.
The workouts, the Shakeology, the challenge groups, the entire format WORKS. It worked before I started coaching and it will work after I'm dead and gone. But what has changed and made the difference in my success has been me. I've gone through the refiner's fire, and survived. My challengers have stayed with me and had such PHENOMENAL success, and now they are as dear to me as the children I work with everyday. I honestly, truly, love them, and am invested in their success.
And THAT was the epiphany. My calling in life is to LOVE OTHERS. And coaching is a way for me to expand and share that love with everyone.
****Life changing moment complete****
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